


You Were There

by Lokiiwood



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Happy Ending, Love Triangles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 16:29:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 19,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16916343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokiiwood/pseuds/Lokiiwood
Summary: This is a commission.You quickly sat by his side to inspect the sketch Jihyun made, cooing over what was surely amazing and brilliant. Jumin said nothing, swallowing his words and forcing away his thoughts as he waited for Jaehee to join them.He wanted you to look away from Jihyun, a little afraid of what he’d feel if you returned the same gaze.But he was here.And you were there...





	1. You Were There

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sleeplesswithapen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleeplesswithapen/gifts).



> This commission is for my dear friend SleeplesswithaPen. What was once a daydream is now 19,500 words!

Jihyun’s smile was life itself—something comfortable he looked forward to. Sometimes, even fell asleep and woke up to when he had three sips too many of a new wine. Today wasn’t different. Jumin watched how his best friend’s lips seemed to curl upwards at the slightest new enjoyment lately. He was happier these days, and it was a relief after all they’d been through.

“Do you want something else to eat?” he asked, eyes pouring over Jihyun’s bowl full of now-cold noodles. The waitress would be back soon, visiting their table in five-minute intervals despite his polite reassurances that they were _just_ fine and should be treated as regular customers. They sat at a small table outside, under a tent with a built-in fan that seemed to function just well enough to blow away any tiny intruders.

“No, this is good,” Jihyun responded with a hum, glancing down at his bowl then returning his gaze to the city street. He was ‘people watching’ again, gently sketching something with that small smile of his that continued to draw Jumin’s attention. Accepting that his friend was far more interested in taking in the day than nutrients, he shrugged. He enjoyed the weather and company enough to relax and join him.

It was nice like this when people paid them no mind. Not recognizing that Jumin Han of C&R and the photographer-painter V sometimes enjoyed dressing casually allowed them to have lunch at quiet diners.

“Say, Jumin, should I paint something for Amelia?”

Jumin tensed, grateful for the sunglasses that hid his expression. Just like that, his mood twisted—pulled out of the calm and into the roaring storm. He couldn’t explain why hearing your name out of Jihyun’s mouth felt grating, but he knew it was something he would have to sit down and work through soon. Ever since Jihyun returned, you acted strangely around him, not that Jihyun was any better. If the man wasn’t talking about art or the RFA, it was about you. Jumin knew you two were close, but it felt jarring. After all, over time it’d become the other way around.

How could he ever forget how heartbroken you were when Jihyun left, your pain almost too unbearable to handle. You asked for updates he could never provide because the rare times Jihyun checked in were in the messenger where everyone could see. He invited you to art shows and concerts because those were the times you laughed the most. He invited you to dinners because you could never manage to catch reservations on your own. At some point, there wasn’t a purpose to your time together—you came because you wanted to, and he was pleased with your companionship. And of course, he was the perfect person to discuss Jihyun with. You both adored him and it was interesting the different ways you both interpreted his art.

But this? It felt wrong.

“I think she’d like it,” he admitted, hoping Jihyun would quickly drop the topic.

“Alright. You know, that blonde girl over there kind of looks like her, my eyes keep wandering.”

Jumin followed his gaze and squinted, trying to make out the hairstyle of the woman sitting at a table of her own across the street.

“Well if it was her, that’d mean she’s having lunch with Assistant Kang,” Jumin nodded.

Jihyun laughed. “Oh, I guess the other person does look like her, too, don’t they?”

“You should call her.”

He laughed again. “No way, you’re her boss, she’ll definitely pick up if you call.”

Jumin didn’t reach for his phone. It was a joke, but one at his assistant’s expense and not one he was willing to see through.

Jihyun’s phone rang and he placed down the sketchpad to check his pocket.

“I-it’s Amelia!”

Jumin raised an eyebrow as Jihyun answered the phone, cheerily as always when it involved you.

“Hello? Yes. Yes, haha, how are you? No. Yes…wait, really? Wait, hey!”

He pulled the phone away and frowned, looking back up.

Jumin mirrored him and eyes widened. It was you, approaching them, laughing with your phone still in hand. You nearly bumped into a couple people in your excitement, short blonde hair waving back and forth like sunshine in your haste. You tutted and finally stopped in front of their table, hands on hips.

“I was wondering why the person with mint hair and a sketchpad kept staring at me!”

You mock-pouted and laughed again before regarding Jumin.

“Jumin! I’m glad you’re here too, maybe we can all go for ice cream after we finish eating? I don’t think Jaehee is too keen on the idea, though,” you said with a sigh.

“Ice cream sounds lovely,” Jumin smiled, which you returned instantly before returning to face Jihyun.

Irritation stirred in his stomach and Jumin’s face fell. It was a passing emotion, but one that shocked him all the same. Jihyun was beaming now, his eyes shining with affection that Jumin was all too familiar with—the same eyes that used to bear into Rika’s, the same smile that used to precede any interaction with her.

Jihyun was in love with you. It was something he knew but still didn’t believe all the same until this very moment. He thought it was the time Jihyun took to find himself that explained his slightly new, happier demeanor. Perhaps part of it was, but when faced with the scene in front of him he knew without a doubt that something far past platonic was taking place. You quickly sat by his side to inspect the sketch Jihyun made, cooing over what was surely amazing and brilliant. Jumin said nothing, swallowing his words and forcing away his thoughts as he waited for Jaehee to join them.

He wanted you to look away from Jihyun, a little afraid of what he’d feel if you returned the same gaze.

But he was here.

And you were there.


	2. To Be Here With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do you think of me?”

It was finally the weekend. Your finger brushed lazily across your phone’s screen in a futile attempt to turn off the alarm, the vibrations feeling a lot more intense as they buzzed near your skull on the pillow. Groaning, you finally forced your eyes open to complete the task before burying yourself back into your covers.

Jihyun was back, and you were going on a date.

You grinned to yourself, heart fluttering almost enough to stir you out your sheets’ safety. Almost. He was going to pick you up himself instead of meeting you at the art gallery. He had insisted, his bright mint eyes and equally enlightening smile pushing you into an enthusiastic ‘yes’ that made you accidentally elbow Jumin.

But before a date could happen, you had to get dressed. One leg slid towards the edge of the bed, but on instinct you paused. You wiped at your eyes and peeked over the edge of the bed to see them on your floor—just as you feared—laying in your way.

“Romeo, McAllister,” you sighed quietly, giggling at the end. They never seemed to change. Two beautiful Scottish Terriers boys you rescued slept at the side of your bed together. Not that they did anything apart, ‘brothers’ as you called them. But their cuteness was in the way.

You rolled to the other side of the bed as quiet as you could muster, a little clumsy in your sleepy state but trying your best all the same. After tiptoeing to your bathroom, you paused to stare in the mirror. Sheepishly, your fingers rolled over your cheeks. Did Jihyun find you attractive? You went through a lot together before he left for those two years, and while you were catching up, part of you doubted Jihyun’s romantic interest in you. Well, it wasn’t like you were oblivious there was something between you two but…this was still technically the first date.

You grinned and flipped your blonde hair to the side of your face. It didn’t matter if you were unsure, because Jihyun was your close friend and you were both going to have _fun_. Even if maybe you wanted more than friendship.

⋗♡⋖

Jihyun’s fingers brushed over the bouquet of flowers he handpicked, their meanings of forgiveness and happiness hid between his excuses that they’d compliment your appearance and bubbly personality. The fresh white tulips and yellow lilies made a pleasant aroma that wafted around the vehicle and he inhaled. Excited yet anxious, he sat in his car around the corner and tried to piece himself together. He knew how ridiculous it seemed—to leave for two years and expect the woman he loved to want to pick up from where they last left off. But he had hope because in two years you had remained single.

You were beautiful, so surely it must have been difficult. Maybe, just maybe, you had waited for _him_. Now that he felt whole again, now that he felt he could love and not harm someone, he wanted to pour all of it into you. Not an obsession, not a projection, but something you both could build together.

He was ready. And he knew what he wanted. But that didn’t quell all his nerves. He checked himself in the car mirror—his mint hair was brushed, but mostly loose just as you said you liked it, and he wore a clean white button-up with black slacks. He wanted to keep it simple, even though the art gallery required formal dress. But, hm, was it enough? Jihyun’s hands left the bouquet that sat in the passenger seat and returned to the wheel. It was time to pick you up, and he’d be lying to himself if he didn’t admit he was eager to see your chosen outfit.

He checked and double-checked the address, eyes darting up the apartment complex as he slowly eased the car down the street. What a cute place, was that a trail? Well, you did mention dogs, maybe that’s why you had chosen this place. What were their names again? He groaned and squinted his eyes, trying to remember. They were terriers, they were brothers…

“Jihyun!”

His eyes popped open and he gasped, a laugh falling out in his own surprise.

Oh, it was even better than he thought.

You waved at him from your balcony, beaming down at him before turning to _shoo_ in two dogs who had rushed out with you. A yellow and white dress, just like his bouquet. He worried his lip, heart fluttering in anticipation.

After you returned to the inside of your apartment, he quickly checked himself in the mirror one more time. He grabbed the flowers, thumbing over the ones that had gotten a little flat from laying on the chair, and exited the car. Jihyun counted his breaths and hovered near the elevator of your apartment building.

After what seemed like an eternity, the elevator doors slowly opened to an angel. Goosebumps pricked on his skin, and he felt torn between being stunned into stone or tossing away his flowers to wrap his arms around you. Had you always been this beautiful? You skipped out of the elevator, his heart skipped out of his chest.

“Oh, Jihyun! Are those for me?” Your lips quirked in an animated smile, and he timidly held the bouquet out for you.

“Y-yes, you look…”

You accepted the gift, holding it to your chest and biting at your bottom lip, eyes pouring over the colors that seemed to belong to you. You were one and the same with the flowers, both beautiful—creamy white moons with yellow stars. He almost forgot to finish his sentence, and quickly tore his eyes away, fully aware he was staring at you.

“You look beautiful, Amelia. It’s nice to see you this morning.”

“Thank you, Jihyun, you look very handsome yourself. The flowers are wonderful and thoughtful…were you spying on me? How’d you know I was going to wear yellow and white?”

His eyes, reluctantly, returned to meet your own. You were giving him a playful grin, but he couldn’t bring himself to joke along with you. He was far too nervous.

“Ah, lucky coincidence...But it’s no problem. Shall we go?”

Your hand brushed a piece of hair behind your ear as you nodded, glancing back at the apartment.

“Forget something?”

He could wait if you weren’t ready—he could wait an eternity.

“No, I’m just a little worried about Romeo, I think he’s getting sick.”

Now he remembered—Romeo and McAllister. You didn’t seem too concerned, but his heart clenched anyway at the possibility those precious to you might be hurting.

“Should we go to the vet?”

You shook your head and grinned at him— _Goodness, what an angelic smile_ —before moving towards his car.

“No, it’s fine, might just be allergies. I’ll keep an eye on him. Trust me, I know my dogs,” you laughed. In an instant, he felt a weird familiarity from your statement. You reminded him of someone, and it made him more uncomfortable than it should have.

“Okay, well, let me know if I can do anything to help.”

He rushed past you to open the passenger door, and he lingered there even after the door was closed after you. _What_ was he doing? Was he too obvious?

Inside the car and on the road, he began to relax. You chirped in his ear about what you read online on the gallery, the art museums and concerts you went to while he was gone, how brilliant Zen has been in his recent roles, Yoosung’s veterinarian internships, and how so many things have changed yet it was all the same.

“Juju got this weird flavor at the ice cream exhibit, and it was the funniest thing, he-“

“Juju?”

“Ah, sorry, Jumin. Dumb nickname I gave him. Anyway…”

Jihyun chuckled. You were on a nickname basis with Jumin? That was wonderful. To have his best friend be good acquaintances with his girlfriend was a dream. Of course, Rika knew Jumin well, but… Ah, and it wasn’t like you were his girlfriend. He felt his cheeks heating up at the bold hope for the future. Just being in your life was good enough for him, but he had long ago decided he wanted more.

He should embrace it.

“Amelia, we’re nearly there. Do you want to head in now?”

“Sure!”

You beamed at him and his next breath came out ragged as he pulled into the covered lot. The bouquet rested comfortably in your lap, and although he felt a little guilty you planned to carry them around, he loved looking at you with them all the same. He was being selfish. But he decided to embrace that, too, just this once. His therapist told him self-centered indulgences were healthy sometimes. At least, that’s the excuse he was going to keep telling himself.

“Jihyun?”

His mind had wandered. He had already parked but was still gripping the wheel, fingers tapping.

“Sorry, let’s go,” he stuttered out, peeking over to see you staring straight at him, the car mirror reflecting a perfect ray of rainbow light that sent a stripe right over your face and heart.

His fingers shuddered on the wheel; what he would give to just lean over right then and there, to place that pretty face of yours between his palms and taste your shimmering smile in the quiet dark of the parking garage. He wasn’t brave enough to go for it and choked down the fantasy, embarrassed with himself for even imagining something so audacious.

“Are you excited?”

He flashed you a modest smile, glad you hadn’t picked up on his ogling. “Very excited.”

_To be here with you._

⋗♡⋖

Jihyun was a perfect gentleman. You already knew as much, but you wondered if he was going above and beyond for you today. At first, you chided him, telling him you were a capable woman who didn’t need him to do every little thing for you. But, it seemed he forgot every time you so much as glanced at a door. The only thing door he hadn’t offered to open was the women’s bathroom, and the only thing he hadn’t offered to carry was _you._

The flowers nearly slipped from your grasp, distracted by your blatant fixation on your date. Jihyun was staring at a particularly nice photo, one you immediately recognized as blazing in its brightness, but made you increasingly uncomfortable the more you looked at it with him. Was it a photo? Or was it a painting? It seemed ethereal, what appeared to be close-ups of stars trapped in a lens. Perhaps it was a mixed medium, and you normally would’ve been able to tell with how often you went to these art museums, but this one, in particular, was confusing. Perhaps that was what made it so fascinating to Jihyun.

Or maybe it was because of the content.

The flowers seemed to prick against you as your eyes bounced between the two, studying his facial expression and the art piece. Was he still interested in…suns? In _her_? You didn’t want to interrupt him, and part of you felt guilty for even thinking that way. He’d come so far in his recovery, and to question it over a picture felt…

“This one is so strange. It’s almost like it’s a mixed medium, but I think it’s just a really nice painting,” Jihyun hummed, finally turning away to smile at you.

Your heart sped up, growing along with your guilt. Of course, he was just admiring art, what were you thinking?

“Are you alright?” he asked next, stepping a little closer to you. You resisted the urge to step back and nodded, shying away from your eyes. “Yes! I was thinking the same thing about the picture…”

He nodded and gently took your hand to your surprise, his face turning away as he captured it. “Oh! I want to show you something, in particular, this way!” Feeling your cheeks heat up, you eased your hand closed over his, fingers unsure whether to remain flat or entwine with his own. He was holding your _hand_! You felt like a school girl again with the fluttering of your mixed feelings, but warmth overtook everything else as you fell in step with him. He led you around a corner of the exhibit and continued straight, no hesitation in his steps.

Wait, how did he know where to go?

The question needn’t answering as you went down a corridor and saw what was at the end of the hall.

“Jihyun?” you gasped, now the one leading as you approached the painting, much larger than the others in the same vicinity. You couldn’t contain the squeal that came out of you, eyes traveling over the scene trapped in a golden frame. A hyper-realistic woman sat upon the top of a destroyed castle, raising a sword triumphantly to the sky, surrounded by various animals including one dog laying its head on her shoulder. The gray clouds were parting to reveal sunlight – a new dawn – spiraling light down the woman to reveal rain still nestled on her weapon, clothes, and companions. She was the victor of a vague, but hard-fought battle, smiling so assuredly you felt you could feel its radiance even in your separate dimension. She was a woman so lifelike and beautiful you felt you could reach out and comb your fingers through her wavy, raven hair.

Entranced, you didn’t remember you were holding your companion’s hand until he had raised it near his lips.

“Amelia? Do you like it?”

“It’s amazing…How…”

“When I was away I saw this artist…She was painting something, it was still so early, but I knew it’d be amazing. She reminded me of you and…hm, well, I became her patron, really. I made sure the finished painting made it to this exhibit so you could see it. I’m so glad you came.”

“Oh Jihyun it’s so beautiful, thank you so much…”

And really, it was. He was so considerate of you. The person who painted this reminded him of _you_? You had to be red now, between his gentle kindness and the hand holding it was getting to your head. Your hand was still near his lips, and your eyes traveled up your arm to land on them. They were so soft, wait, was he going to kiss your hand? Up more, you could see him staring at you as if he wanted to say something.

“Y-yes?”

He blinked, and an emotion appearing to be shock crossed his face before he abruptly let your hand go.

“Ah, sorry! I didn’t realize…um,” he looked away, “but I’m glad you like it.”

You looked away too, eyes drawn back to the beautiful painting, then below it to read the description.

There was nothing for this painting, just the name of the work.

_Amelia._

Your jaw slacked and you really did drop your flowers that time.

“I’ll get that for you!” Jihyun exclaimed, beating you to the floor. He quickly raised up with the flowers in hand, bumping into your jaw.

“Oh!” You cringed as you backed away to see horror plastered on his features. Stumbling forward, he carefully placed a steady hand under your chin. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention…did I hurt you?”

You bit your smile away best you could because _oh sweetness_ he was going to give you a cavity.  “No, silly, I’m fine…I was just…you named it after me?”

“Named what?”

You nodded to the painting and he followed your gaze to the plaque on the wall. His hand slowly fell away from your face and his eyes went wide, darting back to you. Oh, he was blushing.

“N-no, I didn’t…I didn’t tell her to name it that…Oh, this is a little embarrassing.”

“Coincidence?” you asked, the disbelief very present in your inflection.

He gave you an awkward laugh, one hand nervously moving to tug at his sleeves. You had no time to think about why the sight made you smile before he was stuttering out an explanation. “I _may_ have mentioned you in our conversations. I promise I didn’t even suggest your name as the title.”

“I like it,” you giggled. “It’s a good coincidence.”

“Uh…W-well, I think it’s a beautiful name so it…suits the painting.”

“Jihyun…”

“Um, Amelia,” he started, taking a small step forward into your space. “I was thinking…Oh, sorry, one moment.”

He reached for the phone in his pocket and gave you an apologetic smile before walking away, raising the device to his ear.

Your shoulders slacked and you exhaled. Oh goodness, you didn’t realize how tense you were. Every time you had a quiet moment with Jihyun, you felt magnets between your two bodies, as if at any moment you would both be drawn into a kiss or confession. Not that you would mind kissing Jihyun, you had certainly thought of it before, but you wanted a serious relationship. Could you do that with him? Was he interested in that? He had left you for over two years, and although you weren’t selfish enough to take it personally, it was still two, long, years…

You decided to check your own phone to stave off the intruding thoughts, having completely forgotten you even had one in the presence of Jihyun’s comforting aura. There were a couple messages in the RFA app, but nothing of concern. You certainly had time in the future to address them. For now, you just wanted to enjoy your date. You wished for once to be able to take pictures in the museum so you could show off the ‘Amelia’ painting but you sighed and opted to stop by the gift shop before you left.

“Amelia,” Jihyun started, a frown tickling his otherwise neutral face.

“Is something wrong?”

“N-no, I just…I was having such a good time I forgot I’m supposed to be meeting with Jumin soon.”

You touched your lips with your flowers, more curious than saddened since you were also supposed to meet with Jumin tonight. It was the weekend but he must’ve had a lot of free time. You had nearly forgotten about the meet-up and felt a twinge of guilt, a stubborn ache that was just enough to cover up the disappointment of Jihyun’s departure. The idea of accompanying Jihyun to meet with Jumin came to mind, but you figured that might be intrusive.

“Well, we’ve been here for about six hours,” you admitted, hiding your smirk now as he checked his watch in disbelief.

He laughed and shook his head, returning his attention to you, and you suddenly felt exposed. The flowers didn’t hide you at all, and Jihyun looked like he was once again being magnetized, stepping into your space as if there were no plants in his way. “I’ve also been having a great time, Amelia. I’m sorry to cut it short, but I don’t want to break my promise…even if it’s for you.”

Would he be able to hear your heartbeat speeding up? _You_ definitely could. You stepped away and began leading the two of you back towards the exit, trying to cover up your flustering with a sense of duty. "No, you cannot! Let’s go!”

⋗♡⋖

“Jumin, she was breathtaking. Did you see the dress? I think she took a picture.”

His friend was much more interested in his wine than his line of conversation, or perhaps he was annoyed that he was late—and Jihyun was never late with Jumin.

“I didn’t see it,” Jumin sighed, long fingers lightly grazing the row of wine bottles at his kitchen bar. He was being indecisive and focused on tonight’s selection, standing over it like he was making careful considerations at a wine tasting.

“It was white and yellow, just like the flowers I got her. It was a perfect coincidence, really.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t take a picture of her.”

Jihyun faltered. It was true.

“I wanted to.”

“But?”

Jihyun’s excited demeanor faded into the couch along with the rest of his body, suddenly feeling very exhausted. They briefly touched on this before, but Jumin was very clearly prodding at the sensitive topic again. Just because he could be honest with him didn’t mean he liked to think too much about it. Not when he’d come so far, not when the dark haze of all his mistakes was finally in the back of his mind rather than the front.

“I felt too uncomfortable to do it. It would be too familiar, wanting to take pictures of her while at an exhibit…”

Jumin said nothing, returning to his side to hand him a glass of wine as he accompanied his best friend on the couch. Jihyun accepted it, giving him an appreciative smile before taking the first sip.

“You know you shouldn’t let things that make you happy be tainted by the past, just because you shared those things with someone who hurt you.” _And he hurt back._ Jihyun nodded—Jumin was right, he was always right. “You’re so mature, Jumin. Thank you. Maybe next time I’ll be braver. I actually forgot to ask her to the orchestra tomorrow, I got distracted when you had called me.” He chuckled to himself about his own carelessness.

Jumin hummed but didn’t say anything further. They fell into a comfortable silence, and he sipped on his wine, letting the liquid cool his lips as he gazed over at his friend who was drinking a little faster than usual. Between the gulping and how long he took to even choose a wine, Jumin was clearly stressed over something. Was he trying to handle it himself? Jihyun frowned. He wasn’t exactly in a position to offer advice, but…

“What’s on your mind, Jumin?”

His dark eyes flicked to his. But it wasn’t comfortable, Jihyun felt chills prick his fingers from the cool glass he held. Like a stray cat, Jumin appeared to be assessing him, as if he wasn’t sure if he was a threat or not. Patient and waiting, ready to flee.

“Did I say something to upset you?”

The eyes softened - not a threat.

“No.”

Jumin took a careful sip and leaned back. Jihyun opened his mouth to maybe ask again but Jumin’s eyes left him as quickly as they had first matched when Elizabeth the 3rd approached. Jumin gently smiled downwards and his cat jumped into his lap, regarding Jihyun with her bright blues while she settled to lay down properly.

Jihyun gave a small wave, but the cat closed her eyes. He awkwardly laid the hand back down and stared at the two, perfectly content and quiet with each other. His gut pinched, guilt rising to mock at him. After a two year absence, maybe he wasn’t the only one who changed.

⋗♡⋖

You exited the office store with your new pens, a light pink blush staining your neck because of who you were unexpected with.

“Zen, no!” you huffed, puffing out your cheeks and attempting to project certainty. But god, how could you around him? Years of being in close proximity to the actor and you still couldn’t grasp how handsome he was, scarlet eyes disarming you with their alert, beautiful intensity and his singsong voice rendering your mind useless with its honey-like words and sweet charm. He was a living statue, and you were always a tourist, even as his close friend. Ironic that he was dressed today in attire you deemed to be a modern take on various classic sculptures--a casual gray sweat suit with _The Thinker_ barely broken up by yellow hues in someone’s artistic vision.

“Please?” he laughed again, pouting down at you.

“You’re s-so unfair,” you attempted to pout back, dragging your eyes away before his made you change your mind.

“But you _always_ hang out with him,” he whined now, and you could see from the corner of your eye that he was folding his arms - like a _child_. Zen was always so ridiculous!

“Well he makes time for me and you don’t,” you teased, glancing down at your phone to check the time. Zen made a dissatisfied groan and you giggled, shaking your head.

“Now you’re being unfair….Fine, whatever. Since Jumin ‘scheduled’ with you I guess I have no choice.”

“You already didn’t have a choice, don’t you need to get back to set?” It was a rhetorical question. Zen was doing a short modeling stint nearby and practically ran to meet you when he learned you were only two blocks over.

He mumbled something before bowing to you dramatically. “Yeah, yeah, okay princess, I’m going, I get it. Though I don’t get why he deserves to see you in such a cute dress.”

“I w-went on a date,” you stammered, blushing harder from the compliment. Zen was so annoying!

“...With Jihyun?” he asked, slowly. He sounded confused.

“Yes,” you muttered, before gaining a little more confidence in your voice, “And I have another one tomorrow at an orchestra performance.” You saw Driver Kim approaching where you both stood. Zen noticed too by the tilt of his head, and he scrunched his nose.

“Alright, well, be careful,” he sighed. “See you beautiful!”

Zen gave you a quick wink before dashing off and you half-waved, a little disturbed (and flustered) by his reaction. You’d ask later.

Driver Kim was a kind man and without Jumin in the car, he was always a little chatty with you. Not that you minded, although he was tight-lipped on any affairs concerning his employer. It was as expected of a professional, but disappointing when you were curious about Jumin’s fascinating appointments.

“Thank you! Yes, I’m fine,” you reassured him before he tipped his hat and returned to his seat. Another pleasant and calming ride quickly fizzled to anxiety as you approached the building with its frowning guards. A quiet elevator ride with the attendant and a minute later, you waited at the entrance to the penthouse with its three guards, all men you recognized from various previous visits.

One pressed the buzzer for you and you waited before he nodded you through. Stepping inside the penthouse, the tight air still didn’t disappear. Something was different. Elizabeth the 3rd turned the corner to greet you with a light mew before spinning around.

“You want me to follow you, girl?” you mused.

She meowed again and began walking forward. You hesitantly followed, glancing around, wondering why the room felt heavy.

“Juju?” you called out, stepping around the corner after the fast-walking cat to see that he was not in his living room. Well, he probably wasn’t in the guestroom, so maybe his bedroom? Your hunch seemed correct as Elizabeth the 3rd continued forward to the very room, beginning to scratch at the bottom of the door. Worry crept over you and you gently knocked with your knuckle. Jumin had obviously approved you entering the estate, so why did he lock you and his precious cat out of his room?

He didn’t answer and you raised your knuckle to knock again but the door opened as the light of the room went out. You stepped back and began smiling before the sight of him made it fall off of your face.

“Jumin?”

He’d never seemed so tall - not that you weren’t short - but he’d never _towered_ over you like you were easy prey that walked into the wrong place at the wrong time. The intensity in his gaze held you stringently, and you would’ve felt fear had this been anyone else. But it was Jumin and you forced yourself to speak.

“Are you alright?”

He nodded and closed the door behind him, his other hand holding an empty wine bottle. You tried to change the subject to one he would enjoy since his mood seemed sour. Traveling with him back towards the couches of the living room, you tried to make your voice as nonchalant as possible. “Were you and Jihyun drinking wine before I got here?”

He tensed again, walking past the couches to the row of various wines on the kitchen counter - all opened. You decided not to sit down and followed him, propping your arms up on the cool surface to look over the bottles yourself.

“Did something happen with Jihyun?”

“Hello, Amelia.”

“Hello, Jumin.”

You quirked an eyebrow. Surely he wasn’t...drunk? Usually, it was incredibly difficult to tell and while you were getting better at it, Jihyun still had you beat. But this behavior was abnormal, to say the least.

He walked to his cupboards to retrieve an empty wine glass and set it down on the counter next to you. “And what’s on the menu today, Jumin?”

“Jihyun.”

You sputtered, thankful you hadn’t drunk anything quite yet. “W-what?”

“What’s your relationship with him?”

Your mouth gaped, surprise and an angry blush heating you a lot quicker than you hoped were showing. “Um, wouldn’t you know? We went on a date today and we’re going on another one tomorrow.” Where the hell was this coming from? You two talked about Jihyun all the time but this was...almost accusatory. You didn’t like his tone of voice and you definitely didn’t enjoy the ice emitting from around him.

“I suppose I don’t understand, hence why I asked. Are you still pursuing a romantic relationship with him?”

Normally you could tell Jumin everything, but these questions made you ill. The Ice Prince waited for your response, swirling his glass gingerly as if there were liquid still inside, barely out of reach from his touch to freeze.

You wanted to say yes, but the words and the confirmation locked themselves away somewhere in your chest.

“I don’t know,” you admitted, feeling guilt from the sudden truth of it.

Jumin raised the glass to his lips, pausing when there was nothing to consume, then removed his attention from you towards the wine selection.

“Why? Did he mention our date?” you asked, reaching for a particularly interesting Chardonnay, needing the distraction.

“He never stopped, actually.”

You nibbled back your smile. You were glad he enjoyed the date as much as you but it wasn’t the right time to indulge in it, not with the way Jumin was looking at you.

“Do you think I’m…messing with him or something?” That would make sense of his reaction. You knew Jumin thought highly of you, but that wouldn’t be an excuse to toy with his childhood friend’s feelings.

“No,” he said, pointedly, watching you pour yourself a glass of Chardonnay before pouring himself some.

“Are you sure you should be drinking more?”

He swirled his newly-filled glass and scowled at it as if it were the source of his problems. “Perhaps it is a good time for me to stop.”

You took a careful sip, eyeing the moving liquid of Jumin’s glass before sighing and placing down your own. You moved in closer and gave him your best smile, hands moving to cover his and guide the glass back to the counter.

“Jumin, I’m sorry if I did something wrong…I’m not messing with Jihyun, I promise.”

“Then why are you confused?” he snapped.

Your hands quickly returned to your sides. Why was he being like this? “Jumin, you’re hurting my feelings…Should I leave?”

He stepped in closer, the scowl on his face replaced with concern. He certainly was drunk, his emotions tilting in either direction like a seesaw in the wind if only you knew which direction the wind was blowing. The confusion made you take a step back, but he followed.

“You shouldn’t leave,” he said. Another step back from you, another step forward from him.

“Jumin, you’re scaring me,” you mumbled. Looming—he was _looming_ over you.

“I apologize. I just…” He paused, and you stopped, too.

“Yes?”

A hand raised to his scalp, smoothing his dark locks of hair back as he peered down at you, staring into your eyes as if _you_ were the one still hiding secrets.

“What do you think of me?”

You blinked. “W-what do you mean?”

He leaned in further and you instinctively flinched away, only to find your back against the wall. Every passing second made your heart thump harder, faster as you found yourself vulnerable and confused under his piercing gaze.

“Are you romantically interested in me at all?” he clarified, his hand falling from his head to yours, brushing a piece of blonde back behind your ear. The heat from the small touch just made you burn, even more, when he left his hand where it was. Jumin’s thumb slowly brushed over your cheek, tracing down to your chin before lifting it gently towards him.

You couldn’t answer. Your eyes dropped from his scrutiny to his lips—they looked so soft, Jumin’s touch was _so soft_ , he looked like he meant to kiss you against this wall.

You jerked your head away and pushed past him for your purse. “I-I have to go,” you stuttered. He made no sound to stop you, only a distant mew floated to your ears as you left to the lobby, quickly closing the door behind you.

Oh god.

He was going to kiss you.

And you were going to _let him_.


	3. With Pearls, Us Without Purpose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are you saying this doesn’t make you uncomfortable?”

“Are you sure? It’s no trouble,” his flowery voice echoed from your phone’s speaker. It lay charging on the kitchen counter as you dusted around your apartment, stepping over your eager (and healthy) dogs who were still excited over their treats from the veterinarian’s office. Normally their playfulness would perk you up, but you assumed cheeriness was a lost cause for the day. You hadn’t slept well. The events of yesterday replayed like a televised loop, somehow broken and glitching between the way Jihyun smiled at you and the way Jumin nearly pinned you against his wall.

Neither was particularly a bad memory, but together they didn’t— _couldn’t_ mix.

“No, it’s fine, don’t worry about me,” you called to him, hoping your anxiousness didn’t translate over the wire. You needed the extra time to put yourself together for your orchestra date, to be ready to face him again after your Jumin encounter last night.

“Alright, well I’ll meet you there,” Jihyun said.

“See you, V!”

There was a pause. You put down your duster.

Oh, crap.

“Jihyun! Sorry, I don’t know where that came from!” you called, rushing towards your phone.

“It’s alright,” he chuckled. “See you soon, Amelia.”

And he hung up. You looked down at your phone in disbelief. V? _V_? Why did you say that? Jihyun abandoned the name, telling you it was a cover-up for his own insecurities. To use it felt so _wrong_ as if you didn’t acknowledge he was a different person now. Using his real name was something that took him years to do and was so deeply personal, _how_ could you slip up like that? He had simply laughed it off, but you knew better than to think it hadn’t hurt at all. You needed to apologize when you saw him.

With a sigh, you began playing music on your phone, letting it fill up the space to attempt to drown out your uncomfortable thoughts.

Attempt.

It failed, instead of covering up the memory of Jumin’s soft hands touching your cheek, it accompanied it—your heartbeat a crescendo, his soft lips a melody. Did you lean in, then, or were you only imagining it now in the safety of your home where no one could know your secret? Your secret that you were confused. Two years of thinking _about_ Jihyun, two years of being _with_ Jumin. Why did Jumin make your heart skip? When had this started?

⋗♡⋖

It was about a year ago.

“Juju!”

You came out of your room, twirling in the new, red dress and grinning from ear-to-ear.

“It’s perfect!”

 You sighed, smoothing your hand over the lacey threads that made the bodice. It didn’t show too much skin but it was still _extremely_ sexy—flattering, truly! Jumin looked up from your couch with a smile, his hand still scratching behind Romeo’s ear while McAllister approached you. Upon seeing you, your friend’s smile fell.

“Oh, you don’t like it?” you frowned, glancing back down your short frame. After ruining your dress for the art exhibit tonight, Jumin had asked your size and rushed over with replacements, even when you assured him it wasn’t that serious. But with Jumin, he hardly took no for an answer.

He stopped petting your dog and stood up, his long legs closing the space between you in a few steps. You started feeling self-conscious with the close inspection. Maybe it was too much. “You look beautiful,” Jumin decided after the awkward pause. You exhaled and jumped forward in a hug, wrapping your arms around him for just a moment before pulling away.

“Oh thank god! Thank you, Jumin, I was so worried it was too much for the exhibit.”

“Too much?”

You nodded. “You know, maybe a little too…formal, or something.”

“Everything I brought here is appropriate, I assure you.”

“You’re so thoughtful,” you giggled, reaching your hand up to his sleeve to brush away some dog fur.

Jumin’s hand lifted to press over your own, but he didn’t push you away, lacing his fingers instead between yours. “Let’s depart, we shouldn’t be late.”

You nodded and let him guide you to your door, glancing down at your still entwined hands. You locked your apartment, feeling your still entwined hands. You spoke with him as you both descended inside the elevator, excited about the art exhibit, confused about your still entwined hands. They finally separated when you both climbed inside Driver’s Kim car. You remaining side-by-side in close proximity, the usual these days instead of sitting on opposite sides of the car. It was more comfortable and made talking easier, what friends did as opposed to business associates.

One arm lounged over the back of the car behind your neck, his fingers ghosting near your shoulder as he listened with great care. Jumin always seemed to be interested in what you had to say even when you thought he shouldn’t be.

“I think Jihyun mentioned going to an art exhibit this weekend, too,” you hummed, acutely aware of the small brushes of his fingertips, wondering if he even noticed.

“Perhaps. Let’s focus our conversation on you for today, if you would indulge me,” he responded.

“Me?”

“I would like to know more about you. I’m interested in your personal preferences – the colors you like, the art genres you prefer, everything. It will make our visits more pleasant if I’m adequately prepared.”

“Well…” you sighed, focusing your thoughts together, “I like a lot of things…”

And so you told him, rambling on about the big things, the small things, and the things you were unsure about because Jumin asked careful questions and _always_ wanted details. You wondered if he was brilliant enough to retain it all, seeing as the thoughts were sporadic and you barely contained them yourself. Old memories resurfaced mid-sentence, some fond and others not. As you peered up into his handsome face, you suddenly grew cold. Although the conversation was amicable, although you loved his company, now you understood why the whole interaction seemed off. Jumin’s fingertips continued to nearly caress you, and you both had somehow drawn closer during the car ride. It felt off because it _was_. Somehow, in-between the wine dates, the house visits, the pets, and the exhibits, the fundamental friendship had changed.

It felt...intimate.

⋗♡⋖

You didn’t seek any social interaction or check your messages, only answering Jihyun’s calls to confirm your arrival. You felt that if you dared check the RFA chatroom or look at any private messages from Jumin, that you’d smile a little too wide. Tomorrow or after the performance you would look at them. For now, you needed to focus on your date and your feelings towards him.

“Amelia.”

The soft call of your name was enough to send your heart fluttering in waves and your doubts flying away with it.

“Jihyun!”

You spun on your heel to see him approach you, one hand tucked in his coat pocket and the other one waving. Your mint-haired date’s small smile spread when your eyes met. He was like a painting – a sight that radiated so much positive energy it formed a halo around him. You could stare forever. “I hope there was no trouble arriving?”

Your smile matched his inadvertently, it felt like a spell was lifting the corners of your lips. “Not at all.”

Jihyun didn’t immediately respond, searching your irises and mouth perking open as he hesitated. “Yes?” you giggled.

He shyly looked away for a moment, glancing at the entrance to the orchestra, then slowly removed the fist from his pocket. His eyes fell to his hand and you followed to see him holding a black, velvet jewelry box. The warmth in your chest was now uncomfortable as your heartbeat quickened. Of course, he wasn’t going to _propose_ – but the idea absolutely terrified you.

“I got you a gift,” he blurted out, carefully wedging it open to reveal a carefully nested pearl bracelet. Relief flooded out of you in the form of a sigh. “It’s beautiful, Jihyun, I…what’s the occasion?” He gently pulled it out of the case and chuckled lightly. “Um, before that, may I?” His head nodded towards your hand and you lifted it towards him, allowing him to clip it around you.

You stared at his delicate hands as they brushed against yours to secure the bracelet.

“For just being there for me. I appreciate your friendship, Amelia. I know I’ve told you…” He sighed, biting his lip and smile wavering for just a beat before he continued. “I know I’ve said how thankful I am that you stayed with the RFA after everything that happened with Mint Eye, and I’ve apologized so many times, and it’s never enough but…ah, I’m rambling. It’s a token of gratitude. I hope you enjoy it.”

You rotated your wrist and let the fingers of your other hand wander over the smooth, round objects that felt cool against your skin. It fit you perfectly. A token of gratitude? “Jihyun, I’m just…really happy we’re friends. I’m with the RFA because I want to be.” Something you didn’t catch flashed in his eyes before he nodded and clasped your hand between both of his. “Thank you. Let’s take our seats inside.” Jihyun had quickly let go of your hand after you both entered the large, arching doorways of the indoor stadium. The cold winds of the bright outside were instantly cut behind heavy doors. Your date led you past crowds of cocktail dresses and suits who chattered in polite conversation and hushed laughter. You took in the ornate, golden chandeliers that decorated the halls and loomed over the vacuumed auburn carpet you both quickly glided down. “We have middle seats,” he said in passing as he checked the film-like strip of paper that listed your seat numbers.

“Oh, here, I think!” you pointed. He followed the curve of your finger and read the large door’s plate before smiling at you. The halo still glowed around him even in the dim, yellow lights of the lobby, but he no longer appeared angelic. Still a painting with the facial features and charm of a national treasure, but perhaps he was a piece of art to take more literally, not one you felt you could hold in your arms. The thoughts swirled in your mind, distracting you until Jihyun called your name.

“Are you alright, Amelia? It’s hard to tell with the lighting but you seem…pale.”

“Sorry!”

You rushed forward but Jihyun stepped back into the lobby, letting the heavy door close as he regarded you with patient curiosity.

“Did I do something wrong? You’ve been looking at me in such a strange way ever since I gave you that bracelet.”

His hands slipped over the pearls, tentatively feeling them before withdrawing to his side.

“No, no you haven’t,” you reassured, raising your hand to wave away the concern. “And I do really love this bracelet.” You shot him a smile and he attempted to return it, but you could tell he had his reservations.

“If anything,” you nervously laughed on, “I wish I brought you a gift, too. I feel bad, I hope this wasn’t too expensive.”

That seemed to do the trick – Jihyun chuckled and turned back to the doors. “Don’t worry about expense, anything I spend on you is because I want to.”

You hummed in response and accompanied him into the grandeur of the orchestra stadium. If you didn’t know better, you would’ve been surprised by the stark contrast. The sparsely crowded, small corridors of the lobby was nothing like the boom emitting from the collective voices of thousands of seated spectators. The sight drew you back into comfort and anticipation for what was to come. You stepped in renewed confidence and Jihyun glanced over his shoulder to flash you another smile. He stopped at a row much closer to the orchestra performers than he previously implied and held out his hand to assist you. Gladly taking it, you brushed past seated people until you found yourselves dead center of the row.

“These seats are amazing, Jihyun,” you cooed.

He leaned close to you and you flushed but didn’t move, letting him whisper, “I’m glad you like them.”

Jihyun leaned back and you bit your lip, folding your hands in your lap and rubbing over your pearls. You were both quiet as the audience continued to fill in, the silence comfortable although you weren’t sure if you liked it. With a flash, the already dim lights focused in on the stage and the swarm of people hushed down the aisles. The curtain slowly rose to reveal the conductor, who welcomed the audience with a bow, before it continued its ascension, revealing the entire group standing by their instruments. They bowed and scattered finger snaps broke out across the audience to return the greeting.

Relaxing in your seat beside your date, you flashed him a look of appreciation that he shyly grinned into.

Your head snapped back to attention as the music blared in a sharp allegro. There was no warning – the tempo danced through your ears as if it were fighting. You glanced to Jihyun, who similarly had wide eyes that softened when he caught you looking at him. Oops.

The explosive music wined down as it continued and you exhaled a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Plucks of strings mimicked speech, flowing softly like a chorus until the movement ended in a single, almost monotonous flat. The music picked back up again similar to its original roar but this time, it was somehow pleasant and easier to discern.

Orchestras were portals to another world. While everyone surely imagined different things to the music, the feelings were all the same. When the music was sad, perhaps your neighbor thought of a memory they couldn’t possibly share with you, but you both teared up all the same. As the music faded to a happier tune, twisted memories of gray eyes churned your stomach.

_Bzzt!_

You gasped. _No_ , your worst nightmare. You’d ignored your phone for so long you forgot to turn it off before curtains! Jihyun looked over as you suddenly stood in your seat. He rose to follow and you shook your head, motioning for him to stay and enjoy the performance. Embarrassed and head lowered as much as possible, you slid down the aisle and practically ran back into the lobby. If it weren’t an orchestra performance, perhaps you would’ve been worried about the distraction of the heavy doors opening, but that inkling of worry vanished with the music behind soundproof doors.

_Way to go, Amelia!_

Frustrated, you pulled out your phone to see it still ringing – Juju. You quickly rejected the call, then cursed yourself for doing it. You weren’t a _child_ , you couldn’t avoid one of your best friends just because you were confused. The two of you hadn’t spoken since the incident but you needed to so things could go back to normal. For all you knew, it may all be a misunderstanding. But how could someone misunderstand _that_? There was no mistake in the intensity of his gaze, no mistaking the way he drew into you, no mistaking how fast your heart was beating.

Your feet shuffled against the plush carpet, mind racing to make a decision so you wouldn’t miss even more of the concert. At the very least you should text him back to explain yourself – nothing too long or serious yet. You tapped the black screen back to life and worried your lip, mentally preparing yourself. Do you simply tell him you’re at a concert and will message him back soon? Perhaps that you can’t take a call at the moment but want to talk?

“So you came.”

There was no need to message him at all, now that you heard his voice. You nearly dropped your phone as your head sprung up to see Jumin exiting the elevator at the end of the hallway, dressed as usual in a black suit, but your eyes lingered on the blood red tie tucked in his vest. The colors, his silent steps over the carpet towards you, and the empty hallway made you feel like this was a horror movie and Jumin was the vampire. Jumin was at the performance _and_ he called you?

“W-what are you doing here, Juju?”

He stopped walking, keeping an abnormal distance of a few feet away, and tugged at his tie. No, this close you could see the color of his skin, not quite pale enough to be anything undead, but he wasn’t exactly the most lively you’d seen him. With a gulp, you took a conscious step forward.

“I was curious,” he answered stiffly.

“Curious?”

Did he know about the date with Jihyun today? Was he sneaking around? That didn’t seem like something he’d do.

“This performance seemed like something you’d enjoy, so I bought us tickets. But you were preoccupied.”

You winced. Maybe if you’d answered his calls all three of you could’ve been seated together. “I’m sorry!” you blurted out. You were – for many things, although you weren’t sure how to communicate that just yet. Jumin finished closing the gap between you, head tilting to the side as his eyes groomed over you. You’d almost forgotten about the last encounter until his tall frame once again seemed to surround you in an oppressive aura.

“There’s no need. It was presumptuous of me to organize a meeting prior to any discussion.”

You shrugged, feigning a friendly smile, hoping that doing it would force your body to eventually feel it. “It wouldn’t be the first time, Jumin.”

He paused. “No, I suppose it wouldn’t be. I apologize.” His rigid shoulders fell away.

“It’s...wait, why did you call me then?”

“I knew where you’d probably be seated and decided to meet you here.”

“What? You knew I’d leave?”

“I figured Jihyun would get middle seats. I doubt he knows you as well as I, that you prefer a wider, taller view.” Jumin glanced away, not pausing as he finished his increasingly terse explanation. “But I didn’t know you would leave. I took a chance.” His eyes clouded over with the admittance and a wayward hand ran through his thick locks.

“Um…” You weren’t sure where to start. Jumin spun through hoops just to make this audience with you, yet both of you were dancing around the reason. He didn’t appear worried, perhaps it really was all a figment of your confused imagination.

“I’m sorry I ran away yesterday. I was...really uncomfortable.”

“I made you uncomfortable? In what way?”

Wow, so it _was_ all in your head. “Nothing in particular,” you fibbed, “You weren’t in a good mood.” That part at least was true.

“I see.”

The reply was cutting, splintering the conversation where it was. In the lull, your thoughts cleared enough to remember you were on a date. You always lost track of time when you were with Jumin, perhaps because you’d come to rely on his unyielding sense of responsibility. You’d certainly never missed an appointment that he was aware of when you were in his company.

You sighed, glancing at the door that leads back to Jihyun. “I should-”

“No. Wait.” The flatlined expression on his face hardened. Now, Jumin resembled a vampire again - latent hunger, smooth demeanor, a confident _demand_ in his words.

Your eyes widened as he invaded your personal space once more. There was _no_ reason he needed to be this close!

“Are you saying this doesn’t make you uncomfortable?”

An immediate replay of the night brought a vicious blush to your cheeks. Jumin had feigned ignorance? Your hesitation allowed Jumin a moment to wrap a heavy hand around your wrist, slowly raising it until you were both looking at the pearls draped on it, shimmering new.

You wanted to tear your arm away but the combination of his haughty look and hot hand persuaded you to wait a little longer. He scrutinized it, pressing his remark before raising his eyes back to yours. “You never answered my question. Are you romantically interested in me at all?”

The words wouldn’t connect, not fast enough for him anyway. “You said you’re unsure about Jihyun, but you won’t answer about me.”

“What the hell is wrong with you, I’m on a date! Why are you asking me something like that?”

It should be obvious – but you couldn’t accept it. Jumin had been there for you, there for Jihyun, supporting the development of you and Jihyun’s relationship or lack thereof. For him to have feelings for you at all was taboo, a betrayal. _For him to have feelings for you meant…_

“Because every time we’re apart, I can’t focus.” The bass in his voice trembled, and he set your wrist free. Yet, the act wasn’t enough to make you _feel_ free – he still had you trapped in his aura, still gazed down at you in a way that rooted you into the carpet as if it were quicksand ready to swallow you whole.

“Juju…I don’t know, I don’t understand.” Your flushed cheeks felt cold compared to the burning sting of tears welling up in your eyes. In an attempt to compose yourself, you spun back towards the doors. You wanted to escape back to Jihyun, but your feet stomped to a halt at the large doors that towered over you, surveying. They were taller than you remembered, and they kept growing, the details of their gothic exterior increasingly ominous in your hesitation as if they were the entrance to Judgment. _For Jumin to have feelings for you meant…_

The only thing missing was coiling, black fog and the whispers of the damned. When hot breath curled around you instead, your head tilted back to see Jumin had followed you.

“You don’t know.” His words were murmurs, confused as he searched you over. “Then…”

 

“Then?”

 

The back of your head slowly hit the doors to Judgment as you were pressed into it. His soft lips met yours and the sins of your past thoughts finally betrayed you. If these were the doors to Judgment, they would’ve opened immediately to consume you into their fiery grasp. Instead, the warmth concentrated on your face and chest. You closed your eyes – maybe this wasn’t real, maybe if you closed your eyes it would stop happening. But it didn’t. Your lips parted to welcome Jumin instead, your heartbeat sped up, and you felt weaker and weaker as the kiss lingered.

You should stop. You couldn’t take this back. But wasn’t it too late? You were kissing him back now, and Jumin’s hand slid up your bare arm to land on your shoulder, but only for a moment before it continued to your neck. His long fingers traced around the curves of your veins, without a doubt feeling your quickening rhythms. They pulled around your neck to softly fold around your ear, then slid forward until he was cupping the side of your face. Fingers gently laced into your hair and tilted your head to the side. You offered no more resistance, feeling Jumin nip at your bottom lip before brushing his lips down to your newly exposed neck, pressing a few, slow kisses to your pulse.

You shivered under him and gasped, to which Jumin responded by returning to press his lips against yours. You hummed into him. He tasted just like how he looked, more-so like you imagined. There was a hint of red wine and the bliss of releasing control to a tongue that was warm and commanding.

“Amy…”

The sigh of your name made your eyes shoot open and rip your head away. The trance was broken, but you couldn’t pretend it all didn’t just happen and that you didn’t want it to continue. _For Jumin to have feelings for you mean_ t…that it was reciprocated. You knew that now.

Attempting to breathe properly, you faced Jumin again, who backed away. He stared at you, his usually collected demeanor visibly disturbed. His eyes were wide, accompanied by a deep shade of red that dusted his cheeks. “I wanted to help you. I wanted to help you know.” There was a lack of confidence in his voice as if he were trying to convince himself more than you.

You pressed a shaky hand to your mouth as you regarded him. You felt no need to tell him how you felt, the evidence was smeared in gloss on his lips.

“What about Jihyun?”

His eyes squeezed shut as he exhaled. When they fluttered back open, Jumin was back to himself – mostly. His voice was calm but you’d spent enough time with him to see his body language was defensive. He tugged at his sleeve as he looked away from you. “I’ll handle it.”

You pressed a hand behind you against the cold door. It was back in your realm again, just a regular door and you just a woman who had to face the consequences of your actions.

“It’s not something to be ‘handled,’ Jumin. I waited…” The tears that had disappeared into the kiss returned to tumble out of your eyes. “I waited two years for him, Jumin.”

You were confessing things you hadn’t even dwell on yourself. But deep inside you knew the truth – you knew since that car ride that something had changed with you and Jumin. Not only that, but something had changed with you and _Jihyun_. “I was hurt too, and I tried to be there for him but he wasn’t there for me, and…” _I’m not a replacement for Rika waiting for him, I’m a person too_. You sniffed, embarrassed. Jumin didn’t ask for this, you shouldn’t be dumping your feelings onto him, not like this, and especially not _here_.

At some point in your rambling, you hadn’t noticed Jumin had returned to your side. He ran careful hands over your arms before placing a tender kiss to your forehead. You sniffed again and wrapped your arms around his waist, burying your face into his suit. His own arms hesitated, but quickly found themselves returning the hug and pressing you tighter against him.

“I apologize, Amelia.”

You shook your head but said nothing. This was a mess, it was all wrong, and you couldn’t find anyone to blame but yourself for letting things get this far.

⋗♡⋖

Jumin returned to his private booth, but not even the deafening sounds of the orchestra were louder than his pounding heart and the replay of yours breaking as you cried into his suit. What had he _done_? What was he thinking? No, that was his problem, he _wasn’t_ thinking again because it was you and he had acted on impulse. His eyes never rested long on the performers, always moving to where he knew you were sitting, your blonde hair next to the mint hair so blatant in the row. Jihyun surely would’ve seen that your eyes were red, even if you had properly washed everything away. Would he even ask? Perhaps in the dim light he wouldn’t notice, and by the time intermission came, your eyes will have returned to their natural, bright hue.

He sighed and pressed a hand to his chest. It was still beating at an irregular rate, perhaps he should make a house call and mention it to his doctorÉ He took a sip of his wine and swirled it, looking into the pool of red liquid as he mulled over what just transpired. Part of Jumin didn’t regret what he’d done. He was in love with you, and you apparently returned his feelings. But at what cost? He needed to speak with his best friend. Things would never go back to how they were after this, but Jumin couldn’t bear to see you suffer any longer. It didn’t matter if Jihyun was a kind person and an amazing friend, you didn’t belong with him. Jihyun, in comparison to him, didn’t know you at all.

 _He_ was the one making you smile, _he_ was the one who was there for you in the two years Jihyun had abandoned you and the rest of the RFA to pull himself together after the traumatic events you _both_ had gone through. You taught him that dogs weren’t so bad, that it was alright to get excited about things, that it was even good to love things knowing you could be hurt. If you hadn’t been around with your smile and laugh, he didn’t know how he was going to be well enough to continue dealing with Rika and Saeyoung. He rubbed his temple at the thought and sighed. He couldn’t keep thinking about this.

Instead, he relaxed in his seat and looked up at the ceiling of the private booth. The taste of your lips rapidly replaced the lingering wine and he ran a finger over them.

“Amelia…”

He never had an experience as intense as that. He’d never craved another human being as intensely as he did you. Jumin wanted you in ways he couldn’t even accurately describe. When he pressed you against the doors, it was an out of body experience. He hadn’t been in control of himself, as if he were watching events unfold from someone else’s eyes but still feeling it all the same. The soft touch of your skin, the temptation of your glossy lips, the pull of your eyes, it was all too much. He had kissed you because it was all he could think to do. When you said you were unsure if you returned his feelings, it was all an excuse, just like the other night’s out-of-control drinking. He had locked himself in his room, imagining the feel of your hand against his, how warm your body might be curled into his. For once in his life, he had hoped you would show up late so he could calm himself down.

But you didn’t, and he had nearly kissed you then. Getting so close, of course, was nothing compared to the real thing.

The music suddenly halted and polite applause broke out across the auditorium. Somehow, he had tuned it all out. It would’ve been a waste of a ticket had he not spoken with you. People cleared out as lights flickered back on for the intermission. Jumin stayed where he was, instead deciding to check his phone. His thumb clicked the RFA app first, heart skipping in that strange way it tended to when something involved you. He sighed as he clicked your icon to check his messages. Unread, still.

His jaw tightened but he let it go quickly, moving over to his work email and skimming through the six standing in his inbox, four of which were from Assistant Kang. He decidedly ignored them all. He didn’t have the energy to read, let alone reply to anything right now. Other than you.

But other matters had to be taken care of before he could probably speak with you again. He said he would handle it and he meant it. He reopened the RFA app and clicked for Jihyun, only for a new message to pop up before he could even begin to type.

“Let’s meet at your booth after the performance.”

Ah, so you must’ve mentioned that he was here. Well, that made things easier.

“Yes.”

He put the phone and wine on the table beside him and twisted his hands together in contemplation. He had to tell Jihyun the truth, that’s what their relationship was based on, or at least what it _used_ to be. The deep trust issues that had developed after Mint Eye ran deeper than he wanted to admit and he himself had hidden his feelings for you for well over a year. It was hypocritical of him and he sighed into his fist.

It didn’t matter. He made his decision tonight. But, he realized with a sudden spike of fear, you hadn’t vocalized your feelings. So had _you_?


	4. Our Everything, As Proposed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I want to take responsibility for you, Amy.”

Jihyun waved at the bodyguards outside the booth. He recognized them and they clearly returned the sentiment, because as he approached they stepped aside to allow him to knock on the door. It was always easy to find Jumin. Evidently, even in places he didn’t want to.

After a few moments, it creaked open to reveal his friend standing there, meeting his eyes then quickly shying away. Jumin opened the door wider and moved to allow Jihyun inside. He stepped in, quiet as he ignored the lavish decorations and made his way straight to the glass at the end of the room. He heard Jumin click the door back as he peered down at where the giant red curtains covered the previously blaring stage, then over to where you and he sat not even 20 minutes ago.

He felt Jumin step by his side, but couldn’t bring himself to look up. They were silent, both men watching people as they made conversation in their seats or on their way out. Jihyun didn’t know where to start, he felt numb after his date with you. “I need to talk to you, Jihyun,” Jumin finally piped up.

Well, this was slightly better. At least this way he didn’t need to be the one to start the conversation. “I know,” he chuckled.

Where to start? Heat returned to boil in his veins – at himself more than Jumin, but uncomfortably upset all the same in a way he didn’t remember ever directing towards him.

“You kissed Amelia.”

After the words came out, he sighed. It tasted bitter and left an aftertaste. He didn’t want to say it, but now it real. “You kissed her and now you want to talk to me about it.” He couldn’t help his shaky voice, but he tried to keep his composure.

“Amy told you?” The disbelief in his voice – or maybe it was the casual drop of your nickname – irritated him more.

Jihyun slowly tore his eyes away from the emptying auditorium to face Jumin, who already had his gaze locked on him. Perhaps others had trouble distinguishing his emotions, but it was always so clear to him. Jumin was confused, hesitant, and perhaps even a little ashamed or scared. He was a little disgusted with himself at the small amount of satisfaction it gave him.

“I saw you,” he corrected.

Jumin’s face fell as he tried to discern his words. What Jumin sought was more information, and Jihyun reluctantly gave it. “I came to find Amelia. It was easier to exit the row opposite the way Amelia went, so I came out the doors further down the lobby. But she didn’t need my help, she was…preoccupied.”

Preoccupied with your lips pressed against Jumin’s. He had pinned you against the door, and you didn’t resist him, which means you wanted it, which meant you wanted _him_. His legs had swiftly returned to his seat, completely unable to get the sight out of his mind or _process_ what he had seen.

“I see,” Jumin exhaled, a nervous hand ruffling through his hair.

“How long, Jumin?”

Jumin’s eyebrows furrowed before guilt and understanding pushed them away again.

“About 15 months ago, I realized I was in love with her.”

15 _months_? How cruel. Jihyun sighed, squeezing his eyes shut. This was hard to process. He was angry, but he was sad, he was stunned, but he was _hurt_.

“I don’t understand, Jumin. When we were in communication, was it all a…a...” he trailed off. _A lie_. Even the word affected him in an abnormal way. Jumin lying to him wasn’t likely, there had to a reason he wasn’t considering. Then again, Jumin used to say the same about him.

“What happened to us, Jumin?” He could feel the ache on his lips and opened his eyes to confirm that Jumin heard it given the hurt on his face. His dry throat felt like it was on fire, painful as if he’d been crying for days.

“A lot of things,” he exhaled.

Jihyun held his hand to his chest, feeling it ball in and out of a fist. “I’ve loved her for longer than you, Jumin.”

“I disagree.”

“Excuse me?”

Jumin didn’t answer him right away, trying to find the words to explain himself properly. But how could he, was it even possible? Even so, Jihyun waited patiently, mind racing to piece together a possible explanation Jumin could have for him. How could he deny the feelings he’d held deep for over two years? That wasn’t something he could fake, not something he could or wanted to conjure up on a whim. An image of your face flashed in his mind and he bit at his lip. No, even the imaginings of you were enough to send his pulse racing. The light of your smiles and eyes and the way they made him feel was enough to inspire an entire painting collection – a project he already started, but not one he was ready to admit yet.

“I don’t think you love her in the way she needs,” Jumin decided on.

“And you do?” It was a genuine question, one that Jumin answered with his classic assurance.

“Do you know her favorite color?”

Jihyun’s eyebrows furrowed. It was a rhetorical question, but did Jumin really think his obsession with detail was making a point here?

“Do you know what she’s most afraid of? Do you know why she likes you?”

Jihyun’s heart flipped as he realized he didn’t know the answer to any of those questions. It wasn’t because he didn’t care, but he had never bothered to ask. Those topics always came up casually when he was with someone in person and he never tried to push a topic that would make them uncomfortable, but he…

“I’m making up for that lost time now.”

“Jihyun, do you know the names of her dogs?”

This one he knew. “Romeo and…” It was on the tip of his tongue. “McAllister. But Jumin, although I’m lacking small details, it doesn’t mean I don’t care. It doesn’t negate my affection for her.”

Something about his response upset Jumin, who wasn’t exactly glaring at him but displeased.

“That’s the problem, Jihyun, they’re not _small_ details. Do you know what she said to me today?”

The more he spoke about you, the more flustered Jihyun got. Whatever affection Jumin had for you he was wearing on his sleeve, barely contained by his rigid demeanor and scathing tone. When Jumin didn’t automatically continue, Jihyun hesitated a careful, “What?”

Jumin’s shoulders slumped and he traced a circle in the glass with his finger. His voice returned to a low volume, no longer irate but…sad.

“She said she was hurt, too.”

⋗♡⋖

“Jihyun!”

You hurriedly stood up from the bench and wiped off your skirt when you saw the familiar tuft of mint finally exiting the building. You had stopped counting how many taxis you waved away, but at least they served as a distraction. You sighed in relief, but it was hard to smile with the guilt eating you alive. Still, you managed a friendly enough wave to get his attention. His head turned towards you and the hand froze.

Jihyun had lifeless eyes, a slouched posture, and for the first time, he didn’t greet you with a smile. You never realized he always did it until right then as Jihyun stepped in front of you, head hanging and a hand rubbing over his neck. Jumin told him. He knew.

“I said I’d be a while, that you should go home.”

“I know.”

Your arms wrapped around your suddenly cold shoulders as you stared up at him, unsure what to say or how to say it.

“Let’s get you home, Amelia.”

The car ride was eerie, the last bits of the sun’s orange struggling to breathe under the dark navy sky pressing down. Stars weren’t quite visible yet, but you strained to see them out the passenger window. You knew why – as a distraction from the man who’d been contemplating whatever happened with Jumin. The city passed in a blur, only slowing down when you began recognizing the streets and knowing you were soon to be at your home. You’d run out of time.

“Ame-“

“Jihy-“

You both paused, clearly having the same idea. Hints of a smile appeared on both your lips, finally giving you a moment of relaxation.

“Yes, Amelia?” he said with a cough, clearing his throat.

“What happened with Jumin?”

Jihyun’s shoulders slumped. You knew the answer, but you still needed to know exactly what happened before you hoped to discuss it.

“He told me you…” he trailed off, and you tensed. But Jihyun started his sentence over. “We talked about my thoughts on relationships. _Our_ thoughts on relationships,” he corrected. “Amelia, do you love Jumin?”

What? You were preparing to explain the kiss, to talk about your complex feelings toward him, not…Jumin.

You’d been so focused on sorting things out with Jihyun that you never considered he’d be interested in your thoughts on his friend.

Before you could open your mouth, he took your hesitation as an opportunity to clarify. “I’ve spent so much time away, relying on you and Jumin for everything, that I admit I forgot other things besides finding myself are important. I don’t want to be lied to anymore, I don’t want everyone worried about me, thinking I’m so fragile, someone to be fixed unless I turn out like…”

Your wide eyes darted to his hands that shook on the wheel, then back to his increasingly tortured face. Making it into your parking lot, he finally eased into a spot and turned the key. The car stalled, the air conditioning still wafting out warmth that barely managed to blow the ends of his hair as he calmed down.

“I want you to rely on me, too, Amelia. Even if that means we’re just…friends.”

“Jihyun, I - I care a lot about you.”

Jihyun only smiled. “I know.”

The pain twisting itself inside of you snapped. Unshed tears burned your eyes, even more as he fully turned to you, his sad, mint eyes dark in the dim light of the car and his smile just as gloomy.

“May I try something, Amelia?”

You nodded.

Jihyun leaned over, pausing just a breath away to search your eyes before pushing a soft kiss to your lips. It was light and sweet, little bits of affection that tickled at your heartstrings. It only lingered a moment before he pulled away, the heat of his mouth disappearing as if it were never there and only apparent on his cheeks’ blush. The intimacy of the act, hidden away in this private moment in Jihyun’s car, made you both silent.

But…

“I only ever wanted you to be happy. If Jumin m-“

“Jihyun.”

“Ah, yes?”

“Thank you. I want you to be happy, too.”

Jihyun walked you to your door, amicable conversation guiding you both even though your laughter was sad – muddled by what was left unsaid. You fiddled with the lock, debating whether to invite him inside or not. After tonight, you probably shouldn’t. Hearing the soft whines of your dogs on the other side made Jihyun take a step back.

“I’ll talk to you later. Have a good night.”

“Yes…good night, Jihyun.”

He smiled and nodded, but you left the key and quickly embraced him. Jihyun returned it eagerly, the tightest hug you’d ever received from him, and exhaled. The tension melted away under his gentle rubbing on your back, but after a quiet moment, he broke away. The brightness on his face lit up your own. He was smiling still, but this time for real.

For the first time since all this confusion began, you truly felt that everything would be alright.                 

⋗♡⋖

Everything was not alright. Jumin attempted to fix the swoop of his hair that had fallen over his eyes in his haste up your apartment stairs. As he rang your doorbell and straightened his suit, his eyes scanned over the dark parking lot. He didn’t see Jihyun’s car or anything out of the ordinary, only Driver Kim’s limousine temporarily leaving for personal errands under directions to return in an hour.

The red lights faded out of view as the door clicked open. Your makeup from the day was still on, but your hair was up and you’d already changed into a warm robe.

“Juju? W-what are you doing here this late?”

“I apologize for not scheduling this visit, I just heard that Jihyun took you home and I…”

Oh, perhaps he should have thought through the purposes of his intrusion. Once again, he wasn’t thinking.

“…decided to make sure that there were no issues.”

Your hands gripped your waist and you scoffed. “Issues? Like what? A flat tire?”

“I meant issues with Jihyun because of the topic of our discussion today. It wasn’t exactly pleasant. But of course, I could’ve easily arranged to fix a flat tire as well.”

You blinked up at him before your lips turned upwards. A laugh, then a second, then a third, before your hands were covering your mouth to try and muffle your convulsions. He couldn’t understand what you found so humorous about the situation, but he relaxed. He assumed that at the very least things must not have gone awfully with Jihyun and you weren’t too upset about his disturbance.

In fact, you grabbed his hand and ushered him inside, closing the door back as you calmed down.

“Juju! You’re so _jealous_!”

Jealous?

“I don’t have the time for jealousy, nor do I have any needs that cannot be met. What could I possibly be jealous of?”

“Are you serious?”

“Quite.”

You laughed again and sighed, a cute eyebrow cocked up at him as you pondered a response.

“Jihyun wished us well.”

“How so?”

Your eyes averted and your body language shifted. He continued to stare at your quickly reddening face, a bit too distracted by how adorable you looked with your embarrassment and drooping robe to care too much about what exactly Jihyun meant.

“He wants us to be happy together i-if that’s what we wanted to do.”

“’To do’ meaning be in a romantic relationship?”

You turned completely away from him much to his disappointment, although he could still see the pink tinge on the back of your exposed neck. He recalled how you turned your back to him before, hesitating at the doors back into the performance hall to return to Jihyun.

He hated the view.

 “Amelia.”

You needed to look at him – only him. He needed to be the one person you didn’t turn your back on, the one person you wanted to be with.

“Yes?”

Frustrated that you still weren’t facing him, he found his hand on your shoulder. No, that was rude, he couldn’t physically move you just because he wanted.

“I think our conversation would go smoother if we were facing each other.”

The hand fell away and you slowly rotated back towards him, arms crossing.

“You have defensive body language, Amelia. Are you still so uncomfortable around me?”

It pained him to think he’d hurt you.

“I’m just confused,” you mumbled.

Your hand brushed away hair that wasn’t there, the white pearls on your wrist flashing at him. How had he not noticed them? He found himself upset again – confused, that’s what you had told him before. And to still be wearing Jihyun’s romantic gift?

His fingers reached to smooth over the pearls, the symbol of his own failure that adorned you.

“Still confused about Jihyun?”

“N-no! About…us. We didn’t really talk about us.”

You flinched away and hid the offending arm behind your back, finally looking back up at him with your beautiful eyes that only upset him more. How could you be so perfect for him and still be confused about his feelings for you? He obviously didn’t make his intentions clear enough for you to doubt him.

“What more talking do you need?”

He stepped forward, brushing the back of his pointer finger against your cheek and landing on your delicious lips he’d been craving for so long. Kissing you today had only amplified these intense feelings instead of satiating him.

“If vocalizing would help solidify things then I will happily do so. Amy…I love you. If you feel the same way about me, I’d like to know. There is nothing…”

He leaned in, replacing his finger with his lips on yours. “…to be confused about.”

Jumin pulled back, acutely aware of the shock on your face and only feeling arousal from it.

“I...love you, too. I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?”

The question came out in a whisper, a lump in his throat choking him as your words of ‘I love you’ repeated in his head.

“For this whole mess. I should’ve realized it sooner, but I just…I didn’t want to hurt him. I-“

“No,” he sighed.

“No?”

“I don’t want to hear about Jihyun anymore.” Jumin was aware of the sternness in his tone but he couldn’t help it. So much of your relationship had focused around Jihyun and he was tired of it. What would it take to make you focus on him – _only_ him?

“Jumin?”

His hand was back on your shoulder without him realizing. But he didn’t pull away this time. Your eyes were trained on him and he needed it to stay that way.

“Are you going to kiss me without permission again?” you giggled lightly, a tease in your voice.

“May I kiss you?”

“Y-yes.”

Jumin wanted sweetness – something gentle and long that shied away any lingering doubts about his love for you. But the moment you began to lean in, a darkness cast a shadow over his gaze. Your open mouth was something to be devoured, your pale skin was something to be bit red, and your robe was something he’d prefer to discard – and all of it was available for _him_ , not his best friend.

He controlled himself – letting his hands gently cup the sides of your face as he leaned down to finally taste you again. He didn’t think it was possible, but you tasted even better in the privacy of your home. Jumin always found you akin to sunshine with the way pleasantness and warmth orbited around you, but now he was _certain_ that you were partially made of starlight with how deliciously hot you burned his lips.

He needed more of it, more than he ever had.

His tongue traced across the starlight as if to lap up any free rays his mouth had missed, and you gasped into it. The sound of it made him dizzy – what _was_ this? He wanted you to make the noise again, louder. He repeated the motion and bit at your lip, greeted by something akin to a whimper. It wasn’t what he was aiming for, but it was better.

You stepped back and he gave chase. Was he heavy? He could fix that if he was overbearing. Jumin kissed repeatedly at your lips, pushing you towards the couch. Your legs hit it and you fell back with a surprised gasp. The seconds apart were torture. Jumin placed a knee on the cushion and leaned over to continue the string of kisses. Your head rested against the back of the couch and an unintentional growl fell out of him. Your neck was exposed and he felt his chest heaving in reaction. His lips fled to the smooth skin, gently sucking it as he had so desperately wanted to before in the orchestra lobby. The heat of your pulse thrummed beautifully against his lips and he nipped at it, feeling it beat against his tongue.

He suddenly felt your hands wrap around his neck and pushed up against your chest. He wanted so much more skin contact, but there was no way to do that with the robe in the way. Was that something he could ask of you now, or would it make you uncomfortable? Jumin didn’t know what he even wanted tonight – he just wanted _you_. He’d wanted you for so long and now that you were in his arms he couldn’t possibly let you go.

“Amelia,” he exhaled. He had to ask – he had to know.

You squeezed him tighter and his heart flipped in his chest at the small, intimate action. The pleasant aroma of your skin was like home, something just as addicting as being in the comfort of your arms.

“I want to take responsibility for you, Amy.”

“Jumin?”

He forced himself to pull away and peer at you directly; it’d be hypocritical of him to not look you in the eyes now when he’d requested the same of you not too long ago.

“I want you to be mine. I want to be the source of your pleasure and where your affection is directed.”

“Jumin, you’re making this sound like a – like a – business proposal,” you stuttered, a smile on your lips but worry in your stare.

“Perhaps,” he admitted, “but perhaps that makes it more serious and more permanent. Should I draft a contract?”

You giggled and shook your head before pausing. “Well, actually, maybe that would be ideal, Mr. Han.”

“Oh?” He felt his own lips flick upwards. You always did understand his humor, but your willingness to play along was giving him ideas. He wouldn’t deny that the idea of a real, law-abiding contract appealed to him. If Jumin could truly ‘have’ you in some capacity forever, he would gladly take it.

A hand slid away from the couch to land on your exposed thigh.

“As part of the contract, I would like permission to touch you.” He emphasized his point by sliding the hand slightly forward, fingertips just barely breaching under the fabric of the robe.

You bit your lip and it sapped away all of his attention as you answered him. “Permission granted.”

The hand glided forward, inching further over your skin until the tips of his long fingers could feel the smooth touch of silky underwear.

“I would also like permission to remove articles of clothing. Do you wish to set a limitation?”

“No…” The softness of your voice, the approval, made Jumin swallow.

The hand not currently teasing at your underwear moved to the large, loose bow of your robe that sat comfortably on your stomach. He tugged at the knot and it easily fell away. With nothing holding the thin cover together, he could already see it begin to fall off your shoulders and revealing your fair skin that seemed to glow in the dim light of your home.

“You’re so beautiful…” It tumbled out of him, the words completely uncontrolled as he took you in – a temptation sitting before him and surrendering yourself to his command.

“You’re embarrassing me.”

“Is embarrassment uncomfortable? How would you have me remedy that?”

His fingers found warmth as they poked under your underwear, sliding gingerly across your thigh until they came out the other end. Your chest heaved as you gazed at him, more of the robe slipping away and revealing bits of cleavage.

“I don’t know…”

“Surely there’s something you want that I can provide?”

His other hand brushed a thumb over your lips, feeling them tremble ever so slightly as the one in your underwear began to tug downwards. When you didn’t immediately answer, he pressed the gentle finger into your mouth, feeling the slick of your tongue.

“Perhaps,” he began, “I can demonstrate all I can provide.”

His own suggestion caused his pants to tighten around his crotch. The very idea of pleasing you like no one else could be enough to spur him on. Improper ideas that had plagued his very rare dreams and nighttime encounters with you became more detailed in his mind – he wanted to completely and utterly dominate you. Were the imaginings so perverted if you wanted them, too?

You nodded slowly and his finger pressed down. “Suck on it.”

Immediately, your tongue wrapped around his thumb as you brought him further in, quiet but lewd sounds beginning to fill the otherwise quiet atmosphere. His breath hitched at the sight and the fingers tugging your underwear yanked them down your leg before quickly moving to your other thigh to yank it down, too. You gulped around his finger and assisted him, your hands pulling your underwear all the way to your ankles.

“Take off your robe.”

Your hands moved to obey him, slowly pulling the fabric away from your shoulders and letting it slide down your arms. He watched with great interest as they then reached for the fabric still settled on your chest, opening it until the great mounds were exposed to the air. His thumb paused as he stared, completely taken back by the hard, pink bulbs so delicately protruding, your large breasts gently moving with every breath.

Absolutely amazing.

Jumin wasn’t sure what to think beyond that, except that he wanted – _needed_ – to touch them. Were they sensitive? He’d read that smaller breasts were, but of course, every person was unique – and the only one that mattered was you. He caught himself beginning to lean forward before he remembered he was supposed to be detailing a ‘contract.’

“Let’s specify what I’m allowed to touch.”

“Everything.”

He tutted, a smirk forming on his lips even as the aching in his voice was becoming more apparent. “I doubt you wish for me to touch everything. Your eyes, for example, I don’t believe would be pleasant. How about…”

Jumin already knew what he wanted, but the blush on your face as he drew nearer made him take his time. “…your breasts? Would that be enjoyable?”

“Yes…”

“Lean back.” His voice was soft this time. If he was going to fully pleasure you he needed you to be comfortable.

Your arms fell to your sides as your hands rested on the cushion. Jumin adjusted himself, slinking down as your back rested on the couch. Eagerly, he finally pushed in, bits of hair delicately brushing against your chest as his mouth sought your left nipple, warm and soft despite how erect they were. Impossibly, you tasted better than he envisioned and he moaned out as his tongue smoothed against the sweet delicacy.

Jumin wanted to be gentle – had told himself that a slow build-up was what he craved – but he had deceived himself. An unexplainable hunger enveloped him, drove him to push his head further into you, his hand forming a claw around your other breast. His tongue flicked at the rosebud as he tested its buoyancy. Being close enough to hear your breathing above him made his hand’s grip tighter, gentle kneading at your breast until he began to roll your nipple between his fingers.

“Juju…”

Whatever plan he had to ease you into bliss was snatched away at the gentle utter of his name. His eyes shot up to see you gazing down at him, your mouth agape as your hands began to thread into his hair. Jumin couldn’t even _remember_ what his plan was, there was only the echo of your voice in his mind now. He continued to lock eyes with you as his free hand slipped back to your leg. It ran over your inner thigh, up and up until he was at the point of no return.

The warmth was nearly radiating off of you, beckoning him forward. The decision came easy. He forced himself to pull his mouth away, both arms retreating to grip your waist before he nipped at your lip. Quickly, Jumin’s tongue pressed into your mouth. He wondered if you could taste the sweetness of your skin, and if it was possible you could enjoy it as he had. As fast as he started, he pulled away.

“I need you, Amelia.”

“Y-yes.”

He fell to his knees, hands back where they needed to be at your inner thighs, pushing them apart for easy access.

“Forward.”

Damn – the instructions weren’t clear, but you seemed to understand anyway as your body scooted towards him on the couch. The smell of you was strong at nearly eye-level, glistening with a yearning to let him know you were just as eager as he. The pink tulip heart that was your sex seemed to react immediately to the anticipation, the smallest of movements. Like a waterfall spilling out of his heart, Jumin gave in to his desires. His tongue pressed against your sensitive bud, claiming it as his own. He murmured your name, reverberating it deep into you.

Your hands sought his hair again, lacing through his thick locks, thighs finding stability around his head. Jumin’s tongue held no reservations. If you wanted to play a game, he was happy to oblige. Your thighs pressed harder against his head and his mouth fought against your clit, lapping in heavy circles until his tongue slipped further down to the source of the sweetness filling his nostrils. Your grunts of seesawing volume played an unpredictable melody, and every high note caused his fingers to grip tighter onto you.

The pain of his erection in his pants was unprecedented. Groaning, Jumin temporarily removed one hand to hurriedly unclip his slacks. He tugged at his underwear, loosening them just enough to feel like he could breathe properly again. The hand didn’t return to your inner thigh, hesitating as Jumin’s brain jumbled with his next move. You were enjoying yourself, but it was impossible you were enjoying it as much as he. What could he do to make you say his name again? He didn’t realize until you said it how much he needed it. He forced himself to keep his mouth centered and focus on your pleasure instead of begging for the friction he desired against his pants.

His hand finally made a decision - he folded it over your clitoris, eyeing your reaction. You seemed to hesitate, breath hitching and legs tightening around him. Jumin began to rub in gentle upward strokes as his tongue still kept a separate rhythm of coiling in and out of you.

“That feels nice,” you admitted. Your feathery voice floated to Jumin’s ears, its silky caress fighting the need to be rougher.

_Good._

Two fingers snaked up and down the small, cute bulb – zigzags went slow, went fast, circles went small, went large, and through it all he stared up at the way your beautiful lips quivered. In the moment, Jumin’s thoughts briefly wandered to the pleasantry of pink. How could he have not noticed how much he valued your pink lips, pink pussy, pink blush, pink tongue, every bit of you kissed by the soft color of the living’s affection? Suddenly, all the black and navy suits felt cold and dry in comparison.

“M-more…”

The gentle demand brought him back to your shared reality, the Heaven on Earth he was steadily floating away from. He responded with pressing his thumb harder against your sex, forgoing the experimental strokes for quick ones only meant to bring you to the edge. Your body jerked, your vagina sliding away from him even through your squeal of pleasure, and even through the twist of your fingers in his hair.

Jumin gave chase, not letting up the attack, his other hand wrapping around a single leg and holding you forward. Unable to escape any longer, your body began to grind into his mouth, allowing his tongue to reach even further inside of you than it had before. Your moans got brighter, lighting up the entire room, even eliciting the distant whines of dogs, until the noises were cut off like a knife. Your body went rigid against him, the only thing moving the sudden tightness of your walls massaging his tongue. Jumin swallowed down the change that was slightly sweeter, yet understanding immediately what it was just made it all the more delicious.

He slowly pulled his mouth and fingers from your clit away, eyes taking in the long string of mixed fluids as he wiped it away with his sleeve. Since when was he so out of breath? His arm unwrapped around your leg and instead moved to flutter across one of your hands still shakily tangled in his hair.

The sight of you was more than he knew how to describe – your face flushed, just as much out of breath as he was. An angel.

“Amy…”

⋗♡⋖

The gentle call of your name sung you out of your daze. You felt your body still convulsing, numb but burning all at once as it tried to recover from the intense orgasm Jumin brought you to. You gulped before speaking, your labored breath still ever apparent.

“Jumin?”

“Did you enjoy that?”

A short series of laughs burst from you as your eyes blinked down at him. Oh, he _had_ to be joking, right?

“Oh, you can definitely add that to the contract.”

“Gladly.” He pressed a tender kiss to your inner thigh, his gaze dropping over your exposed skin before raising once more to meet your eyes. It sent a shiver through you from the intensity hidden behind his caresses and calm manner of speech. Of course, it hasn’t escaped you that Jumin was nearly bursting out of his underwear. All he had to do was ask.

“Juju…”

“Yes, my love?”

The unexpected nickname dried your mouth of any lewd question you had planned to ask. Instead, you used nonverbal communication. The loose fingers in his hair tightened their grip and tugged him gently forward in quiet suggestion. Jumin followed your lead, lifting off his knees to lean over you. His lips found yours and their touch was careful as you tasted yourself on him. Gradually, your fingers escaped his dark locks. They rubbed down his clothed chest and landed on the bulge that continued to strain against its prison. Jumin hesitated only a moment in your make-out session before his lips were practically fighting yours for dominance. Spurred on, your hand reached into the heat of his boxers, freeing the hard member and moaning into the kiss when you felt the sticky wetness coating your fingertips.

Your wrist turned. Gripping him tightly, all five fingers easily slid down his shaft. Jumin grunted into your mouth, and you extended it by sliding back up, your hand covering the entire length before going back down. The pumping was slow and you savored Jumin’s breaths that sped up despite it.

“B-bed,” you gasped, not stopping your thrusting.

Jumin’s lips reluctantly left yours as you spoke, but then he groaned and placed his forehead on your shoulder, grinding into your hand. Satisfied with the reaction, you bit away your smile and finally let him go. After a couple seconds, he sluggishly sought your lips again, smoothing his hands down your shoulders to help you stand up from the couch. You didn’t separate from the kiss as you lead him towards your bedroom, your robe trailing behind you on the carpet. Shoving open the door to free your two excited dogs, you now trapped them on the other side as you closed it back with your foot.

You both clumsily collapsed on the bed as you tussled with each other in your fevered dance. He moved to bite at your neck and you whimpered. His lips nipped around you hungrily as he pinned you into the covers. Your hands clenched around his back for support before quickly moving to unbutton his top, desperate to feel more of his skin against yours.

“Amelia…” The bass of his voice lowered as he groaned your name in a heated breath across your ear. Shivers sent up your spine made your eyes squeeze together as your fingers continued to move down his shirt.

His chest freed, you let your hand wander over his porcelain skin. Everything about Jumin was luxurious, how could you be surprised by the smoothness and slight indentation of his chest? But you’d teased him enough. The hand sought his throbbing member again, starting your thrusting off at a fast pace completely unlike the slow one from earlier. Jumin responded immediately with a strangled moan and heavy hands that suddenly gripped your thighs. His eyes struggled to focus, mouth slightly open as his hands twitched against you. Jumin began to grind into the feeling again, slow thrusts as the rate of his huffing breaths increased.

Jumin suddenly lowered himself, hurriedly kissing around your face between bated breaths until he reached your ear. Slow, gentle presses tickled your earlobe until he whispered into you. “I want you Amelia, all of you.” You exhaled deeply and hummed, smiling as he sat back to gauge your reaction. With only a slow nod, your smile continued to beam up at him. All the approval he would ever need could be found in the way your eyes concentrated on him and the way your hands caressed his skin from a woman in love.

He ran a hand through his hair, chest still heaving in and out as he tried to control himself, returning a small smile. Gently, Jumin grabbed a hand and brought it to his flushed lips. He held your gaze, kissing at your sensitive wrist where your pulse was strongest and sending a sharp ripple of pleasure down your torso.

He continued to kiss at it as he leaned low over you, then pressed the hand above your head into the pillow. You said nothing, curious. Jumin then took your other arm, doing the same thing – pressing a kiss to your pulse that sent yet another ripple straight to your groin before both your hands were gathered in one of his above your head. His grip tightened and your eyes widened.

“Tell me if it hurts,” he whispered. Your chest tightened as you gulped.

“You could never hurt me, Jumin.”

He smiled at you, his free hand caressing your cheek before moving to push your inner thigh. Jumin lined up with you, the very tip of him wet with your excitement as it brushed against your entrance.

“Please, Jumin.” You answered him before he could ask and he exhaled, slowly beginning to move in and causing you to groan out. He was perfect, a sudden calmness overtaking you as he easily stretched your insides, gentle but large and sure.

“Just like that.” His gruff voice drew your gaze to his lips as he sent the first wave of pleasure through you with a slow thrust, your long moan matching him. “Keep your eyes on me, Amelia.” Your eyes zipped up to obey his command as he sent the second thrust to reward you. “Good girl.” You whimpered in response to his praise and began to move your hips to match his slow pace. Jumin squeezed your gathered hands and hummed as he moved forward, the slight change in angle giving him far deeper access than you anticipated.

“Oh!”

“You look so beautiful like this,” he huffed again.

You were inclined to believe him – you felt more naked than you already were from the reflection in his hungry eyes. But the thought quickly floated away, further and further pushed with each thrust as they increased their pace. Your mouth opened in response to release the quiet cries only a breathless woman could manage. It was getting hard to even match his thrusts – you were at his mercy, bouncing under Jumin Han’s tall body. How were you supposed to keep focused on his hot gaze when you wanted nothing more than to throw your head back?

You felt as if the walls of your sex were swallowing him whole, any more and he’d be touching your cervix – but your lover was deliberate. Could you be surprised that the methodological man was calculating even in the bedroom? If the strokes were timed you’d never know, but it didn’t matter when they filled you entirely every time. Perhaps it was too perfect because you wanted more despite being given everything.

Almost everything.

His hand traced down the side of your arching body until smooth fingertips returned to your clit. At only a brush, you felt heat nearly inflame your lower body and a cry leave your throat. You squeezed your eyes and mouth shut, slightly embarrassed at such a reaction, but you felt Jumin’s lips immediately on yours and his hips stop their movement.

“Don’t hide.”

The command was veiled in a breathy voice, but you nodded and did as you were told. You opened your eyes in time to see Jumin pull away and smile down at you. It was affectionate and you felt your heart swell, a shy smile of your own flowing onto your face.

“Good girl.”

His fingers began to massage your clit again and you cried out once more, but this time didn’t hide how much he was affecting you. You writhed under his careful touches and Jumin moved his hips again, slow but pace rapidly increasing.

“Jumin!”

You felt his grip on your hands tighten at the cry of his name and he leaned in more. A barely audible squeak of the bed snickered under the weight of two adults making love, but it was easily drowned out by your own gasps. His handsome face seemed to blur above you, but you forced yourself to keep watching even as you knew what was coming next.

“I’m – Jumin – going to -!”

He nodded and quickly put you over the edge – his fingers on your clit rapidly shivering like the droning of an engine. White flashed over your vision as you came, all the building tension feeling like an explosion inside of you even as Jumin continued to stimulate you through it.

Jumin grunted and you felt his arms shiver on you. The grunt transformed into a low growl before his grip on your hands finally loosened. He closed his eyes and slowed his thrusts and fingers. He was panting. All the exhaustion fell into the open as you both stayed in your positions, chests heaving.

“Jumin…”

You whispered his name and his eyes slowly opened to meet yours. Your arms widened to greet him and he gently pulled out of you to accept the hug, lying beside you in your embrace. Reaching your face forward, Jumin closed the distance for a sweet and gentle string of kisses.

The silence was comfortable, its own private conversation as you gazed at each other.

“What are you proposing now, Mr. Han?”

⋗♡⋖

You’d been the one to break the silence, and the question caught him off guard. Hm. Proposing, wasn’t that a contract in its own right?

He didn’t know how it was possible, but he already missed the warmth of your hands. He peeled away your arm, bringing it between the both of you to clasp in his hands. He peered over it – what was your ring size? If you were to be proposed to, what gem would you prefer? He could imagine it so clearly, a delicate, priceless stone that sparkled on your finger and let everyone know you belonged to him. It had to be something large and beautiful that seemed to glitter without light, something to compliment the happiness in your eyes, something personally and uniquely crafted from the finest jewelers in the world.

His eyes lingered for a moment longer before running up your arm all the way to your bright face blushing over at him. The fluttering in his heart came anew, but he didn’t let it cause anymore hesitation.

“Well, if I am to draft a contract, the first thing I would want to be considered is my access to you.”

Your intertwined hand squeezed his as you grinned towards him, your tone increasingly teasing as you continued this hypothetical – but perhaps not as hypothetical in his mind – contract scenario.

“I would give you free, unlimited access, as long as I got the same.”

Unlimited access? It was likely you underestimated how much he wanted to be around you, and all the things he meant by access.

“I would have to decline. I wouldn’t be able to let you into private C&R business meetings.”

Your nose scrunched and your free hand tapped a finger to your pouting lips.

“Well then, I would need compensation for it.”

“Name your price.”

“Juju,” you laughed, “Not monetary. How about, hm…I would want pictures of me on your phone or something, so you can see me even when I’m not around.”

“Would that really be sufficient?” It was hard for him to believe something that benefited _him_ counted as compensation.

“I-I guess so.”

“In the case,” he said with a quick kiss to your hand, “Then I will have portraits of you made for my office.”

You laughed and he kissed your hand again. “Perhaps you’re laughing because you think I’m joking?”

It died down and you gaped at him for a few seconds before speaking. “W-what?”

“Although I am concerned an artistic depiction won’t capture your beauty well enough. How do you feel about professional photography?”

You averted your eyes, clearly struggling for words. Hopefully, you weren’t worried, he wanted to kiss all your troubles anyway, even with the conflicting type of desire boiling anew inside of him.

“Amy, I really do want to be the source of your pleasure. Let me take care of you.”

“As long as I can take care of you too, Juju.”

Jumin didn’t immediately respond, gazing into your eyes as he had so many times before. But things were different. Now, he wasn’t afraid of the love in his eyes or yours. This look was reserved for him, and he found comfort in that. The anxiety of abandonment seemed like a distant memory, laughable from the sense of peace he currently felt.

Because he was here – right here.

And you were there – right there.


End file.
